 |
| Superman reading with his Daddy. He now turns the page all on his own! |
 |
| One of his favorite things to do is to walk along this window. |
 |
| From our latest trip to the zoo! |
 |
| If Superman could talk, he would have said, "these pumpkins are mine." |
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Almost Wordless Wednesday
Some of my favorite moments from the last two weeks (in picture form).
Monday, October 25, 2010
Don't Hate Me Because I Am Beautiful
Today I am talking about having a kid that sleeps through the night. I know, right? You totally hate me right now and I get that. The thing is, I feel like I had so little to do with this success that if you should hate anyone, it should be Superman, but don't hate Superman because then I would have to kick your butt.
There is one main thing that I think my husband and I do have control over (that seems to make a difference). His bedtime. I read in one of the many, many books in my new mommy collection that finding the right bedtime can be the key to better sleep. Too early and they either won't fall asleep or wake up a couple hours later like it was a nap. Too late and they might struggle to fall asleep because they are over tired. And in both situations? They will almost always wake up TOO EARLY. So sleep begets sleep...I am sure you have heard of this too, right?
For a long time 8pm was Superman's bed time (Note: His bed time is really the time that I begin nursing him. He tends to fall asleep while nursing and only briefly wakes up when I transfer him to his bed.). It worked fabulously, he went down easily and woke up around 8am. Then one day he started waking up earlier and earlier and earlier . With the above information in hand, we began to move his bedtime earlier and earlier until he was nursing at 7pm and he began sleeping till 7:30am again (frankly anything after 7am is just fine, but 7:30 is great!).
Then recently he started waking up early again AND with the upcoming time change, I knew we couldn't realistically move his bedtime any earlier, so we tried moving it later. Sure enough we seemed to hit a sweet spot at 7:30, but decided to try 7:45 just to see what would happen. Wouldn't you know he woke up early again! So back to 7:30 we went and it is working beautifully! In fact, the last two days we have had to wake him up at 7:45 for fear that if we let him sleep much longer his nap schedule would get thrown off.
There were hiccups along the way, don't get me wrong. There was the whole change thing that was miserable and other times, but usually that meant there was some other factor causing the problem. In fact, despite feeling like those moments would never end when I was living them, they have taken up a very small portion of his total nights since he was born. I guess I needed to be out of those moments to really understand how small and insignificant they were.
So if you are in the midst of dealing with sleep issues, know that it won't actually last forever. You will get through this, they will sleep through the night at some point, and you will one day feel rested again. I wish I could send you endless amounts ofwine hugs until you get there.
TTFN,
Mommy C
There is one main thing that I think my husband and I do have control over (that seems to make a difference). His bedtime. I read in one of the many, many books in my new mommy collection that finding the right bedtime can be the key to better sleep. Too early and they either won't fall asleep or wake up a couple hours later like it was a nap. Too late and they might struggle to fall asleep because they are over tired. And in both situations? They will almost always wake up TOO EARLY. So sleep begets sleep...I am sure you have heard of this too, right?
For a long time 8pm was Superman's bed time (Note: His bed time is really the time that I begin nursing him. He tends to fall asleep while nursing and only briefly wakes up when I transfer him to his bed.). It worked fabulously, he went down easily and woke up around 8am. Then one day he started waking up earlier and earlier and earlier . With the above information in hand, we began to move his bedtime earlier and earlier until he was nursing at 7pm and he began sleeping till 7:30am again (frankly anything after 7am is just fine, but 7:30 is great!).
Then recently he started waking up early again AND with the upcoming time change, I knew we couldn't realistically move his bedtime any earlier, so we tried moving it later. Sure enough we seemed to hit a sweet spot at 7:30, but decided to try 7:45 just to see what would happen. Wouldn't you know he woke up early again! So back to 7:30 we went and it is working beautifully! In fact, the last two days we have had to wake him up at 7:45 for fear that if we let him sleep much longer his nap schedule would get thrown off.
There were hiccups along the way, don't get me wrong. There was the whole change thing that was miserable and other times, but usually that meant there was some other factor causing the problem. In fact, despite feeling like those moments would never end when I was living them, they have taken up a very small portion of his total nights since he was born. I guess I needed to be out of those moments to really understand how small and insignificant they were.
So if you are in the midst of dealing with sleep issues, know that it won't actually last forever. You will get through this, they will sleep through the night at some point, and you will one day feel rested again. I wish I could send you endless amounts of
TTFN,
Mommy C
Thursday, October 21, 2010
Overcoming obstacles...
I have found myself lost for words lately. In the past I have been able to think of lots of things to write about, it was just a matter of finding the time to blog. But recently, I have felt as though I have no ideas left. How can that be? Superman is an ever growing, ever developing, ever changing little person and that should provide ample amounts of content to write about, but sadly nothing has really felt like something I should write about...or if something amazingly new happens, what do I really say about it? It happened. The end?
Then last night something interesting happened to me. An event that evoked a memory long forgotten. A memory that provides a little bit of insight into what kind of childhood I had and quite possibly the reasons I will make some very specific decisions in my life as 'mom'.
Last night I made fish for my son for the very first time. I don't eat fish because I think I am allergic to it (haven't been tested, but it makes my throat all itchy), but I wanted Superman to try it. I got some sole fillets, dipped them in some milk, bread crumbs, then sprinkled some Mrs. Dash on top, and drizzled butter over all of it before throwing them into the over to bake.
Hubby got home right as they were supposed to be done and as I went to check on them, I paused and called him over to confirm that they actually were done. I then causually mention to my husband that once, when I was younger, my stepmother (not the one that just passed, the first one- we will call her 'Lady Tremaine' to avoid the confusion) had me cook dinner one night and it was fish. I think I was probably in 4th or 5th grade. As I was tending to it in the frying pan, she leaned over me and told me that I had better cook it correctly or I would poison everyone.
Whuck? As soon as I told him it made me pause. I hadn't told that story in years and hadn't even thought about it in probably that long.
Yes, she told me that this fish, if not cooked 'perfectly', had the ability to poison every one of my family members.
As a kid, I was so nervous about harming my family, that I then broke out in hives from all the anxiety. I am talking about red, blotchy hives all over my neck, arms and abdomen. I am pretty sure my sister came to my rescue and helped me get rid of them(as she did so many times), but I don't remember what happened next....oh, and in case you are wondering, no one died.
As an adult I look back on that moment and want to smack the living daylights out of Lady Tremaine (just to be clear I would like to say I would kick her ass, but I am so not the violent type). Just in the situation alone I could spend 5 minutes ranting. First if this fish had such deadly qualities what are you doing handing over that responsibility to a child? I think it is clear to me now that this fish would not have been deadly if under or over cooked, but why even say something to the child if you were going to have them cook it? Why couldn't you just "supervise" and help make sure that it would be okay for everyone? Although I don't remember all the details, I am also pretty sure she stood over me for sometime reminding me of the danger. It is no surprise that I got hives. How would you react if someone handed you a loaded gun, told you to shoot at an apple off the top of some sort of explosive devise and added that if you didn't aim perfectly, you would kill your entire family?
I think I have mentioned before that I go to a therapist. It has been really helpful sort out being a new mom, but the original reason I started therapy was because I deal with depression and anxiety. Lady Tremaine did not cause my depression or anxiety, but a lot of times the way I choose to deal with situations comes from my experience with her. Up until now, when I have spoken about her in therapy, I would be frustrated that as an adult that I couldn't go back and protect myself as a child from her. But today, I think of her- parent to parent- and how absolutely hideous she was at guiding me through my childhood. I don't understand it. I don't understand how someone, a mother, could be so unloving to a little girl. I couldn't imagine it when I wasn't a parent, but I struggle even more so now that I have my own child.
I used to worry that when I became a parent that I would parent the way I was parented by her. She was a main example in my life right? I took psych 101 in college, I knew all about patterns of abuse- the child that was abused, grows up to be the abuser. But today? Let me tell you that, although I am sure that I will make my own mistakes....Loving my child with every bone I have? Caring and nurturing him when he needs me? Yeah, that isn't going to be a problem.
I think many of us would say that if you knew a child was being physically abused, you would do something. You would call CPS or the police or someone to help the child. But what would you do if you knew someone that was being verbally and/or emotionally abused? Would you do something? Would you respond the same way? I implore you to do something...anything! Even if it is just to tell that child he or she is not alone in this world, that you love them and that with you, they are safe.
I had a few people like this in my life, people who kept telling me that they loved me, that I was beautiful, that I was special and important, that I was smart, that I was capable of anything, that I was worthy of better and that they were sorry that I was in that situation and that they couldn't change it. These mantras, although sometimes they weren't louder than the hateful words, turned out to be more meaningful to me than they could ever know. Sure I doubted them at times...okay, I doubted them a lot. But when I began to work through all of this in therapy, it was those words that helped me understand that Lady Tremaine was wrong. It was their words that became my mantra until I actually believed it at my core. It was their words that saved me.
Thank you for reading my blog. This has been an amazing outlet for me, but this is the first time I have really shared my childhood with you. Treat it as a child and be kind. Thank you.
TTFN,
Mommy C
Then last night something interesting happened to me. An event that evoked a memory long forgotten. A memory that provides a little bit of insight into what kind of childhood I had and quite possibly the reasons I will make some very specific decisions in my life as 'mom'.
******************
Hubby got home right as they were supposed to be done and as I went to check on them, I paused and called him over to confirm that they actually were done. I then causually mention to my husband that once, when I was younger, my stepmother (not the one that just passed, the first one- we will call her 'Lady Tremaine' to avoid the confusion) had me cook dinner one night and it was fish. I think I was probably in 4th or 5th grade. As I was tending to it in the frying pan, she leaned over me and told me that I had better cook it correctly or I would poison everyone.
Whuck? As soon as I told him it made me pause. I hadn't told that story in years and hadn't even thought about it in probably that long.
Yes, she told me that this fish, if not cooked 'perfectly', had the ability to poison every one of my family members.
As a kid, I was so nervous about harming my family, that I then broke out in hives from all the anxiety. I am talking about red, blotchy hives all over my neck, arms and abdomen. I am pretty sure my sister came to my rescue and helped me get rid of them(as she did so many times), but I don't remember what happened next....oh, and in case you are wondering, no one died.
******************
As an adult I look back on that moment and want to smack the living daylights out of Lady Tremaine (just to be clear I would like to say I would kick her ass, but I am so not the violent type). Just in the situation alone I could spend 5 minutes ranting. First if this fish had such deadly qualities what are you doing handing over that responsibility to a child? I think it is clear to me now that this fish would not have been deadly if under or over cooked, but why even say something to the child if you were going to have them cook it? Why couldn't you just "supervise" and help make sure that it would be okay for everyone? Although I don't remember all the details, I am also pretty sure she stood over me for sometime reminding me of the danger. It is no surprise that I got hives. How would you react if someone handed you a loaded gun, told you to shoot at an apple off the top of some sort of explosive devise and added that if you didn't aim perfectly, you would kill your entire family?
I think I have mentioned before that I go to a therapist. It has been really helpful sort out being a new mom, but the original reason I started therapy was because I deal with depression and anxiety. Lady Tremaine did not cause my depression or anxiety, but a lot of times the way I choose to deal with situations comes from my experience with her. Up until now, when I have spoken about her in therapy, I would be frustrated that as an adult that I couldn't go back and protect myself as a child from her. But today, I think of her- parent to parent- and how absolutely hideous she was at guiding me through my childhood. I don't understand it. I don't understand how someone, a mother, could be so unloving to a little girl. I couldn't imagine it when I wasn't a parent, but I struggle even more so now that I have my own child.
I used to worry that when I became a parent that I would parent the way I was parented by her. She was a main example in my life right? I took psych 101 in college, I knew all about patterns of abuse- the child that was abused, grows up to be the abuser. But today? Let me tell you that, although I am sure that I will make my own mistakes....Loving my child with every bone I have? Caring and nurturing him when he needs me? Yeah, that isn't going to be a problem.
******************
I think many of us would say that if you knew a child was being physically abused, you would do something. You would call CPS or the police or someone to help the child. But what would you do if you knew someone that was being verbally and/or emotionally abused? Would you do something? Would you respond the same way? I implore you to do something...anything! Even if it is just to tell that child he or she is not alone in this world, that you love them and that with you, they are safe.
I had a few people like this in my life, people who kept telling me that they loved me, that I was beautiful, that I was special and important, that I was smart, that I was capable of anything, that I was worthy of better and that they were sorry that I was in that situation and that they couldn't change it. These mantras, although sometimes they weren't louder than the hateful words, turned out to be more meaningful to me than they could ever know. Sure I doubted them at times...okay, I doubted them a lot. But when I began to work through all of this in therapy, it was those words that helped me understand that Lady Tremaine was wrong. It was their words that became my mantra until I actually believed it at my core. It was their words that saved me.
Thank you for reading my blog. This has been an amazing outlet for me, but this is the first time I have really shared my childhood with you. Treat it as a child and be kind. Thank you.
TTFN,
Mommy C
Monday, October 18, 2010
Fall
I love fall. I know, I know I have said this already, but I feel like it needs to be said again. Right now? The sun is shining, the air is crisp and as I look around, there are oranges, yellows, and reds dressing most of the trees in my neighborhood.
For the last week I have woken up to chilly temps at or below 45 degrees. When Superman and I head out to boot camp or for a run (just started C25K), we are bundled up. Him in warm clothes and in his LL Bean bunting in the stroller, me in sweats and several layers on top. I love that I can see my breath as I run, it is as if there is physical proof beyond my body that says that I am working out hard.
By the time Superman wakes from his first nap the temperatures have warmed to a very comfortable 60+ degrees (we have 70+ degree days in the forecast for this week). When we head out for our afternoon adventures we throw on our fleece jackets, but usually end up taking them off. There seems to be an urgency in me to soak up as much sunlight as I possibly can right now. I guess I know that soon I will be wishing for just one more hour of daylight.
It seems difficult to imagine a more perfect kind of day. Cool in the morning, warm in the afternoon, and nothing but sunshine shining down on you. I hope you are enjoying your fall weather wherever you are!
TTFN,
Mommy C
For the last week I have woken up to chilly temps at or below 45 degrees. When Superman and I head out to boot camp or for a run (just started C25K), we are bundled up. Him in warm clothes and in his LL Bean bunting in the stroller, me in sweats and several layers on top. I love that I can see my breath as I run, it is as if there is physical proof beyond my body that says that I am working out hard.
By the time Superman wakes from his first nap the temperatures have warmed to a very comfortable 60+ degrees (we have 70+ degree days in the forecast for this week). When we head out for our afternoon adventures we throw on our fleece jackets, but usually end up taking them off. There seems to be an urgency in me to soak up as much sunlight as I possibly can right now. I guess I know that soon I will be wishing for just one more hour of daylight.
It seems difficult to imagine a more perfect kind of day. Cool in the morning, warm in the afternoon, and nothing but sunshine shining down on you. I hope you are enjoying your fall weather wherever you are!
TTFN,
Mommy C
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)