Monday, June 20, 2011

Yeah, that doesn't mean a thing...

My sister and I were talking today about how nothing seems to mean anything when you are at the end of your pregnancy.

You feel like a bowling ball is between your legs because your baby is so low? Yeah, doesn't mean he is coming soon.

You feel great (no baby in the ribs, between your legs or squashing any organs) and the baby bump is just a mere accessory at your 39th week?   Yeah, that doesn't mean anything either.  He could come tomorrow.

Your baby is 7 pounds according to the latest ultrasound?  Doesn't mean he will be a 10 pound baby by the time he arrives since the ultrasound isn't all that accurate.

You are having a lot of cramping and braxton hicks?  Doesn't mean squat. (neither does not having cramping or braxton hicks, in case you are curious)

You are dilated to 3 cm and 50% effaced?  Don't sweat it.  It could still be weeks before that little guy is born OR it could be that he is coming tomorrow. 

How can we know so much about pregnancy at this point and not have any of these symptoms mean anything about timing of your delivery? My sister, clearly the more brilliant sister in our family, has decided that if she ever gets a one on one with God she is going to make a few suggestions.

First, at the moment of conception your large toenail will change color...preferably a color that would indicate the sex of the child(ren).  The toenail would stay that color throughout the pregnancy, unless of course there was something wrong and then it would change to a new color so that you could seek medical attention.  Finally, about 24 hours before the baby will be born, the toenail will change to a new color to indicate that delivery is imminent so that you can get your final plans in order.

Personally, as I play the "when will he come?" game, all of this sounds fabulous!  What do you think?


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